I don't see what I have to offer...

When I feel that days and nights are not good to me, I know that there's something deep or outside me is not at ease. I kept on listening to my heart pounding and it always skips a beat, weird. I don't know if what does this thing means. Because every time I felt like this, something is really happening.

I can't ignore this hidden emotion that I want to burst. I wanna give up. But I'm pity of the ones I love. The trust that they've given me, the love that never ceases, especially their support, not only financially, but physically and emotionally. 

I can't be tough and I can't be strong every time. I wanna be alone for now. I'm finding silence in my heart, my body, my soul and my mind. I want to feel the breath of the earth surpassing my veins, the wind's blowing off of me that made my soul flew all the way. 

I want to find my self again. The Angelique that my friends always says that who's strong enough, the one who never gives up. The one who can never be lifted up by the strongest wind.  

I'm feeling so lost right now in this world that was once I knew that was beautiful and worth living. Life is not very easy to be played of and I can assure you that.